"Work to become whole enough to love and to be loved."

"1. How to drink without waking up the next morning throwing up between apologies to you and my mother.
2. How to get over the fact that you used to love me. The trees have bled and left red leaves on the edges of streets twice since then. It’s been two years and I still find myself wondering if little kids know they’ve got death crunching under their toes in the Fall. There are never any funerals.
3. How to stop letting everything break my heart. I wish I didn’t cry when you didn’t call. I wish I didn’t bleed every time you said “goodnight” without “I love you.” I wish you loved me. But you don’t. So I wish I were tougher.
4. How to stop you from twisting my words with your tongue when we kiss.
5. How to stop thinking about you and your new girlfriend.
6. How to comfort my mother when my father yells and she shrugs and smiles at me later that night. She doesn’t even clench her teeth but I know her bones are aching.
7. How to love my little brother more.
8. How to love you a little less."